Monitoring software

Has anyone ever used a keylogger program with their kids?
It seems to be a bit of a gray area, I've found a few threads on here but they're pretty old and things have changed a lot recently. I've been looking into this kind of thing http://www.refog.com/hardware-keyloggers.html and I'm not sure I'd even look at what it records, I'm kind of hoping that the knowledge that it's there will be enough.

 

I am not in favor of such software but if you decide to use it do NOT tell the kids. If they don't already know, their friends or a Google search will tell them how to defeat it.

You don't say how old the kids are but I don't know that that really matters. Some will claim that a computer and internet is now absolutely needed for school but that just is not so. Most cities/towns still DO have a library. If the kids were using the system in a way that they should not they should lose the privilege, yes privilege, not right, to use the system. If there is an issue in the usage, and it seems that there is or you wouldn't be looking at such software, the child should lose the privilege of using the system.

Here is a mild case of computer abuse and how it was handled... One of my daughters got busted using an early computer to do her math homework. It was back in the 80's and was on an Atari computer (not the game company). This system used a floppy drive along with a cartridge slot. Well this #3 child figured out that if she put in the B.A.S.I.C. programming cartridge and told it to 'print 2+2' it did not print '2+2', it printed '4'. I was actually VERY impressed! Keep in mind that this #3 child was in the first grade. I thought that for her to figure this out was pure genius for her age. But still she was wrong. I asked her if she knew she was wrong in doing it and she said that she knew. I told her that since she was honest about it she was only banned from the system for two weeks instead of a month. By the way, this same daughter later won a full scholarship to a good college.

OK... there has to be a moral to the above... The point is that for a child to be responsible they must be taught responsibility. It isn't easy but has to be done. Using things like key loggers just takes away the aspect of the child needing to respect you and your showing that you deserve that respect. By using such methods I believe that you are actually teaching the child in the long run that it is OK to step aside from doing things the right way in favor of doing things the easy way.

OK, I probably got too high on my soap box but this is a subject that is close to my heart. Tough love is hard but desperately needed today. Please forgive me if anything I have typed is taken in any way as any kind of insult as that is absolutely not my intention.

 

I agree with Jaylach, Kids have an advantage in learning and imagination, although libraries in the UK have computers with access to the internet for public use. but do you not think it would be more beneficial to sit and talk to you child about what they access on the internet and what you would prefer them not to access, and why, rather than to spy on them, I personally think the spying route is asking for trouble, creating an atmosphere of suspicion, if your child finds out you have installed keyloggers they as Jaylach points out ether find away around, or just use other computers and your still no wiser and they are no safer.

I also agree with Jaylach that computer time is a privilege and as such is high on the revoked for bad behaviour list, as for the 'access for homework' argument I again agree, they have computers at school, and libraries and I see nothing wrong with ether the child or myself contacting a teacher and explaining the situation, so as to allow the teacher to arrange for my child to use a school computer during lunch break, responsibility comes with many nasty disadvantages one of them being facing the consequences of your actions.

Being a Parent is not easy, on one hand you need to be a best friend with no secrets, and yet on at the same time you need to be judge jury and executioner, while remembering your the biggest single influence on your child as they grow and develop into adults. Do you want to teach them suspicion, and deception, or trust and communication?

OK I'll vacate the soap box now, but it too is a subject that opens old scars, too many parents prioritise money and their career over spending time with their families, go sit with your child while they surf the internet and give them the benefit of your wisdom, not a bunch of Rules and Don'ts.

I hope you don't feel this post is directed at you personally, It is an expression of my personal opinion on the subject. I may be right or wrong but that's another debate

 

No insult taken from either of you, I wanted to hear others opinions and experiences of this kind of thing and your replies have been really helpful.
I try to stay in the room when they're online but as they get older they want to be online with their friends and don't necessarily want a parent in the room with them. It's more that I don't trust their friends than my own kids. I don't want them to feel like their the ones with the strict parents but even more than that I don't wnat them getting into something they don't know how to deal with.
It looks like I need to sit down with them and talk to them about the things I'm worried about.

Thanks for your response

 

It is odd to read from the opposite point of view as I was that kid (about 9 years ago now since I started being a morbid teenager ) not so long ago that my parents probably thought what is he up to, though they never seemed to worry too much or have words with me or my brother.

If your kids are pretty handy with computers they would find out you had installed a keylogger, I would have known as I knew where to look and the fact that my parents knew next to nothing about computers (they still don't with the issues I fix...).

Thinking about it now maybe they trusted me a bit or at least thought I had a reasonable amount of common sense between my ears, they at least trusted me more than my brother, I generally got privileges at a younger age than my brother ever has done, like drinking alcohol (in moderation, few cans/bottles, parents would watch me like a hawk first few times) and playing 18 rated games (GTA) both I was around 12-13 years old.

I guess my thoughts would be to maybe trust us young un's a bit , best we learn when young eh, but I suppose it's easy to say from my point of view when I wouldn't have been the one cleaning any mess up, maybe my view will change in time when/if I have my own kids to look out for.....

 

That's actually really helpful, to hear a point of view from 'the other side'
I tend to agree with letting them make their own mistakes but then part of me worries that it just takes one mistake to get them in serious trouble.
This parenting thing is hard!

 

LOL I wonder how fast the birth rate would drop if potential parents understood the sacrifices and emotional stresses involved in bringing up a child, and yet strangely enough ask any parent if it was worth it and they would all say yes. Love is a strange thing.

I can understand your concern about 'one mistake' but one mistake crossing a road can get you killed, yet for that problem we use education and trust, and watch them closely till we are confident they understand the risks, and know how to stay safe.

 

My real concern as to a child's safety on the net is just one type of site. Shoot, if a 14-15 year old boy gos to a free porn site and gets the system infected that can be fixed and the child punished. Saddly, in a chat room (my main concern), if a preditor get hold of a child there is no cure for death or molestation.

While sounding morbid the above is intentionally extreme to get attention. This protection I DO advise! Go to http://www.opendns.com/home-solutions/ and sign up. DNS stands for Domain Name Server. What these servers do is to translate what you type for a web address into the numerical values that a computer actually understands. Even for adults without kids I recommend Open DNS as it tends to be more reliable and quicker than the default DNS supplied with most service providers. Above and beyond that it also incorporates parential controls that can restrict the types of sites the system can access.

Another factor is that you should never have just one account on the system. Each family member should have their own... OK, mom and dad can share one. Mom and dad should be given administrator privledges while the kids should have restricted access. Restricted access can have many levels. One nice thing about this type of setup is that when a child shows that they are trustworty their individual access can be elevated. Yes, once in a while this method WILL take time but part of being a parent is that time for your child is more important than time for yourself.

 

Hello,
I recently used Kernel for Employee Desktop Live Viewer with the help of this software you can monitoring the activities of all employees.This tool very helpful to keep an eyes on activity done by anyone on a system.